Normality. I'm worried.

I'm worried.

I don't know. Sometimes. I feel like the single entity that makes me unique is the direct obstacle to making a real connection with another person. I'm torn with both side compiling a list of reasons to defect to it's opposing mirror. I want to be someone people can relate to, someone they can say "He'll understand." But yet I want to retain my candid description, "How do I describe him? He's just ShadowlessTomorrow." It's clear an issue of the the grass being greener on the other side. Or at least the pastures beyond looks to be so much more populated than the sparse dry brush I find here. Here's a scale, for those of you who understand things visually.

Normal     Fun,weird        WTF!?  The great beyond
|-------------|----------|----|      -------...
                       Me

As you can see, I feel like I'm nearing the WTF!? zone. Part of me wants to go back, and recede to the populated areas between Normal and Fun,weird; though some have been known to exist in the grounds past the control point. I, on the other hand, find that I am so far in no man's land that, well as the name suggests, no man exists (and woman if you want to be PC about it all). I wonder though, that if I were to traverse a little farther. Try to survive on my rations of social interaction, what would happen if I were to arrive at The great beyond. Social life seems non-existent there and I'm already slipping into this unweildly state of acquaintances and single serving friends. Like those sugar packets you find at diners. They are just enough sugar. Just enough. Just enough.

What friends I have, even the two I call my closest... Have started to slowly drift from me. Whether they have a life that they need to dedicate more attention to, or other changes in their life that have them tied up, they feel to be drifting slowly but surely away from me. Like a glacier slowly encroaching a land mass, these external affects are taking over what little ties I have. Ties to those feelings that make me feel human.
Screw this. I'm done for now. This isn't something I need to be typing while at work. I'll continue when and if I come home.

Connect,
ShadowlessTomorrow